It’s a blustery day on campus today, and the morning is full of people scurrying about, holding tight to their jackets, backpacks, and hats. You never notice it, but the more we scurry about, the less we see. I could be biased, but my favorite thing to do, no matter the weather, is to sit on a bench and just observe. Now this goes rather well with a nice cup of coffee in my hands, and a spot of sun to sit in, but I’m thinking you get the picture I’m painting here. My dad bought my mom this little green table with two little green chairs for the porch once, and I would catch them sitting there together talking, or just sitting in silence. It always struck me as the most loving scene, two people enjoying each others silence. Which is perfectly possible. Silence is underrated…you miss a lot when you’re busy talking. Now I talk, and around my parents I always talk, but one on one, silence is probably the most intimate, the most beautiful…beautifully sensual. Hmm, now there is a thought that I could run with for a poem. Why is it people are uncomfortable in silence? Is it that they are completely insecure with their own thoughts that they need to make mindless chatter? Granted I have experienced the moments of awkwardness, but the majority of the time I genuinely enjoy silence.
The wind offers that kind of silence. A bundled up, cuddled together kind of silence. It is almost as if the wind wants to steal your breath and make it it’s own, carry it away wherever it is the wind journeys to. At least the sun peaks out now and then, to offer shadows the chance to dance. I like science, and factual logic, but sometimes it is nice to think fancifully about things in nature, why things are the way they are. Speaking of…
I had a conversation with a friend yesterday, we will call him Jim for blogs sake. We were talking about getting emotionally involved with someone, and how that can make or break the sex life, and whether or not it is a smart idea. Logically I know that the ‘love’ feeling is, biologically speaking, nothing more than serotonin and dopamine chemicals in your brain that either spike or lag, the same thing that, as my buddy Jim pointed out, a drug addict would feel. Jim said “I don’t believe love exists, it doesn’t mean anything when it’s about chemicals.” Now I wasn’t sure how to argue my point, nor am I any closer to finding it out either. Jim said that it is not worth it to love, to bother saying it or feeling it. IT just gets in the way…that it is a pretty way of describing using someone for your needs. Now I believe that love does mean something, that there is that one person (or several for some people) that at that point in time makes everything glow for you. That you would rather be next to that person than anywhere else in the world. I don’t think that wanting to see someone happy fulfills a need you have within yourself, therefore the idea of love is useless if you are just feeding each others needs, because that means ultimately we really are selfish creatures. Despite his logic, which objectively sorta makes sense to me, I love. I don’t think there is anything not worth loving. I think without it, without the beauty of loving someone, something, life would seem a little less ‘shiny’ for lack of a better word. To me life is more than chemical reactions, because if not, we would be no better than animals, there would ultimately be no reason to have the ability to think…thinking doesn’t serve a bilogical purpose, unless of course that purpose is to drive ourselves crazy…then that would be acceptable. Either way, I feel a little sad for my friend Jim, and belive one day, a woman will knock him to his knees and he will finally understand what I mean…or he will sadly end up alone. I hope he sees it!
On that note, I hope all of my dear readers share what they think, as you are always invited to, and that you have the best of today!!!